Thursday, March 27, 2014

Muddled Up

So I have a quick minute available and decided I really needed to get my thoughts onto paper (or whatever right ;-) )
So thing are going at their normal staggering pace - my new job is the ultimate nightmare complete with feelings of being 19 all over again with crazy hours little pay and a demented crazy person for a boss... seems like I just have no luck with working for actual business but have not learnt that lesson yet nor can I find anything that I am actually good enough at to do for myself that would bring enough income in - so just your typical double edged sword methinks!!

On the home front my demented brother is still gung ho to sell our house and if you have followed me here for a while you will know the back story of why and how this is possible so im not going to repeat it again.
After a shocker that wasnt really a shocker considering how we know he can be in terms of fairness in January we have totally lost interest in this house - not organising a new lawn mower or weed eater for one along with a gardener leaving our garden a literal jungle and my veggie patch an overgrown tomatoe and basil feast for the multitude of snails.
We have been accumulating boxes in order to make the move...when it eventually happens, happen with a slightly better success rate - although if I look at the boxes and everything else in the house I dont think its making any difference - in the last 8 years we have accumulated even more STUFF which I cant seem to get rid.  We are such weirdo hoarders!!!

We had an offer in on a lovely little house down the road from us - a small cottage really but on a flat square piece of land, in a managable amount of space.  I did the worst thing possible - i started to make plans and dream of how we would live in this house - and then the banks came back with;- a totally unfavourable offer that we could not reach and so we had to decline the offer and lose the house.  :-(
i have been very sad since then...Liam is obviously his optimistic self and thank God for that - he is working 2 jobs his day job and freelancing to get in extra money at the moment for our expenses and looking for places to live amoungst everything else - the man is a saint!!

On kids school front - Gabriel has had a nightmare start to 2014, including falling behind in class - going backward in reading writting phonics site words and pretty much anything to do with English.  He was being bullied again (by the same crowd of boys from last year) Getting into detention for being disruptive in class as well as struggling with class mates by over correcting and getting them all into trouble all the time.
I met with his teach after only a few weeks of school, with her complaining that he seemed to not be taking his meds (although I know he is taking them) behaving completely spaced out or disruptive and not knowing what is going on most of the time, falling behind and being ostracised by his peer group.

We have taken him to yet another Educational Psychologist who has given us the same response as everyone else he has ever seen - ADHD with word finding problems etc but no real definite diagnosis.  She has asked us to take him to have an EEG done so we have that appointment next week as well as an Eye movement test set as one of his eyes has suddenly decided it will not follow (making reading difficult as well)
We also are in the process of making an appointment with admissions at Dominiques school so that we can get him in there - at least then he will get all the therapies recommended by the Educational Psycologist during school as well as smaller classes which may also help.

And last but certainly not least - Dominique has taken to big school like a fish to water!! Her teacher loves her to pieces, everyone knows her from the little kids to the high school kids. She is taking the bus to and from school and has been very grown up about this new step.
She is however still struggling with English and her report - which we got yesterday - was a below average result which we are a bit surprised about.  We will see the teacher next term (in two weeks time) for parents evening so we can discuss this with her.  She has also been selected for Horse Therapy to aid self confidence and body movement which will also take place next term during school time. She is so excited about this she was bubbling over yesterday!!

So that is life as it is at the moment - crazy busy insane.....All i want is a holiday or time to sleep (which is not really 'me'.)  I cant stop eating - its a comfort thing I know.  And my biggest wish right now is just to have some finality on something - anything...
I am hoping that we will have Gabriel sorted out in the first few weeks of next term so that he is settled and hopefully happier  - That school is so much better or at least our experience of them so far has been much more positive than with Gabriels school.
Then Liam and I have decided that we need to have made a decision about living arrangments by the end of this month so that we can start moving forward - this living in limbo thing is for the dogs and is affecting our ability to focus and that is a huge problem.
As per usual I am once again looking for another job... so ja that is that.

I am finding it very hard to look at books, magazines, pinterest, blogs or anything that shows nice things or design ideas when it is virtually impossible to improve anything in that part of our life either from lack of finances or lack of our own home in which to do it. the negativity toward this house is not a very nice feeling and we all hate being home when we are home which is already very seldom for me becouse of work.
I am honestly tired ALL THE TIME and stressed out beyond belief.

We visited a lovely farm comunity over the weekend were the owner has cows that they are breeding for meat and a hydroponic veggie garden that I cannot get our of my mind!!!

Thank you for the vent!! (or pseudo vent)

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