Aint no fool like an April Fool!

So I see this wonderful life/work coach, her name is Emma and she has spent the last year and a bit helping me to become a better person.
In this time she has asked me the question "What makes me happy?" every single time we see each other except maybe the last 6 month which were consumed with other stuff that I'll talk about later.

The answer to this question is pretty inconclusive considering I don't think I know who I am, I am not sure I have ever known really. And I have varying excuses as to why that is...

This past Monday Emma asked me what 16 year old me loved, and what 16 year old me wanted to do for a living... well - 16 year old me, she was another kettle of fish! I told her she would laugh at me...
16 year old me -
Loved writing poetry and stories and writing for the school paper. She loved to listen to Enya, and draw and paint. She wrote "political and social" pieces and plenty of poetry,  wanted to be a journalist or an architect. Fell in love for the very first time and was heartbroken and abused in the same year but not by the same person. Also wanted to stand up and be the madame speaker Frene Ginwala in parliament. 

 One of Emma's latest suggestions to help me to figure out who the hell i am and what i want to do with the rest of my life is to blog - well she wanted me start one and then I told her that I already have one.
I decided to start a new one and I even made up a really amazing new blog name... which i totally forgot on my way back to the office, and in my typical inability to move past the fact that i am a complete perfectionist and this stopped me from starting a new blog -
here I am writing a post on my original blog - the best place i think as the point of getting me to write again is to figure out whats going on in my head and this is were I started trying to do that all those years ago!
So here I am, again...

Forgive me for my absence and my craziness, I know you love me anyway ;-)

So another item on Emma's list s to study something. She says my boredom is a main reason for my harping on my current situations - work life etc and that if I am busy then I wont have time to dwell on the absolute insanity that is my life - I see her point. My only issue is ... what to study??

I once again tried some online aptitude tests - most of which are total nonsense. I know the most reliable source would be a proper person who does this kind of testing, I also know how to cheat most of those types of tests aand also because of my schitzo personality it comes up with all kinds of ideas that have no grounding in proper answers for me.
Sooo my second idea was to ask Liam, poor poor Liam.
He has suggested prototyping or Design thinking. I am not sure what this is but it is a 5 week intro course which I think will give me an idea of what it is in relation to what i am currently doing in my job?
My other choice is Sociology. So the first idea from Liam is practical and should build on my current "change of career path" the second is something I wanted to go into when thinking of my journalism/political study plans as a younger person ;-).  The one i found is also an introductory type course so I'll see how this goes. Should keep me busy - even more busy than my two children's hectic schedule as well as trying to motivate Liam to do the "over and above" projects that he needs to do to fulfil his KPI for June - not that he seems to think he has the time to do that either. And with winter coming - i mean real winter not Game of Thrones winter people!!

i know that Emma said I should start write with some kind of dark humour which I will most def do going forward - this is just a general catch up get the ball rolling kind of thing - ya know me by now thats how i roll ;-)

So heres to April 2019 the beginning... again!! Oh and did i say how much I LOVE Emma? Well I do love her soooooooo soooooo much!!